Wednesday, April 23, 2014

.:achille's heel:.

Do you know that glam rock group with a lead singer who was south african?the name was sth like the queens, heard they were good... So, in this song they have there is a piece in the lyrics that goes: "bad mistakes, I've made a few", I'm sure you know that one, yeah, champs? ;) so sorry, freddie, but I beg to differ in there, I don't believe in bad mistakes... Stupid mistakes? Yeah... Harmless ones? Sure... Huge ones? Sound like my kind... But bad is not really a good definition of mistakes for me, if only because they teach you not to be that reckless/stupid/oversensitive(insert cause of the mistake here) again... That if you are paying attention... Otherwise, I' sorry for you, but hey, there is still hope! Hang in there! ;)

I've already blabbered about changing, and moving on here... Let's say this is kind of a companion piece (written more than 2 years ago never thought to be published and edited because of an early/late conversation with a friend), right? Ok... This think cleared out I'm totally pro to making mistakes, they are good, they are useful, and more importantly, they show you are doing sth... So what would be bad if mistakes aren't? The not making mistakes part... Sounds confusing, yeah? Well I hope when I'm through you won't look like I'm speaking greek with a french accent (uhum, I realize that so far it is that bad, but never fear... lol)

Where was I? Oh yes, mistakes... To begin with, a mistake is sth you made, so it involves actually DOING something... If you decide not to do anything that is just abstention for me, it is not a mistake, it doesn't involve any kind of effort, you chose not to act... And that is not worth being entitled mistake... It is a kind of hiatus, a sea of possibilities that you decided to let go...

Particularly I don't like to feel in the dark, questioning what would have been, most often than not if I am curious about the outcome I just do it, then if it is not working I try a different thing, but nonetheless I try... Why? Because I hate what if's... They can keep you up at night like the worst of nightmares... A road you could have taken and just ignored can have the power of looking all the more appealing as time progresses, we tend to expect the best and idealize the whole outcome... Ok, maybe that is just me, and it is enough to avoid creating "what if's" like the plague...

Now, where would you say the problem lies? It hasn't always been like this... And I really thought I had cleared all the roads not taken syndrome (if you may call it that) being free of what if's... Ha, so naive... The truth is I've overlooked and underestimated an old non-decision which created the biggest what if ever... And it has become my very own personal achilles' heel... The one that can bring you down in seconds no matter how hard you can fight... Now I have two questions: 1) why would somebody voluntarily do it to oneself? and 2) can you heal an achilles' heel once it is already there?

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