Monday, April 28, 2014

.:define family:.

I was caught up short when pre-testing(because of course, there is the pre-planning, the planning, the post-planning and pretesting, the shifting, the testing, and the actual lesson, now, every body knows that, right?) my lesson yesterday with my "volunteers"(ok, it would be more like unaware-inocent-victims-bombarded-with-questions-in-my-hope-of-getting-valid-feedback, but volunteers will do ^^)...

the topic chosen to develop the lesson (and introduce valid vocabulary) was family... no mystery there, everybody has a family... everybody knows what it is all about, a group of people who love each other and work hard(sometimes harder than the others) to share experiences, learn, and grow together, enjoying the journey with the company they have... easy, yeah?
image taken from

I'd have to say no... sure, some years ago a family would be a mum, a dad, the average two kids and a half and close it with a bow... if you were really brave you'd go for a pet... this is how I grew up, and very few people would escape this prototype, this perfect mold... then there would be the "different" kids... they would be considered spoiled because were only-children or raised by their grandparents in the absence of parents... some were the potential outcasts because: how can a child be raised well by a single/divorced/widowed(insert social judgement here) parent, or even worse, with a whole lot of family living together in the same place? people would pass judgement on things they didn't understand and didn't even care to try...

then the number of divorces grew, and most kids would be split in between houses, parents (of the so perfect family) fighting and raging, the role model shattered to pieces... now being divorced/separated was as normal as it was expected... most people would accept the idea of parents in different houses, with different families, but then, poor kids from the first marriage would end up lost in the middle... not here, nor there... but for the average observer they were still part of a family because it was normal, right?

of lately one last concept has been introduced triggering legal issues and debates on rights and things (yeah, I'll leave the technicalities to my dear lawyer friends, let me stick to the social aspect, ok?), the concept of same sex unions originating a family... you may be shocked, but take a minute to consider the case scenario... two people who love each other decide to be together, to support the partner through the difficulties in life, to cheer when they succeed on sth, to share love and respect, and eventually, while growing together, raising a small being, educate this new person with the values they share, and hopefully help create a better world complete with wise and understanding  grown-ups...

now remember we are talking about two men, or two women, take your pick... no more, no less, that's what a homosexual union would be like... and if you ask me, they have more chance of being more honest and sure about their choice than the average judgmental mary-sue... why is that? what do you expect from a middle-class girl? to study, graduate, get married to her mr. right, work, have kids, be the perfect character in society... people have been massacred with this idea, so much so that if a person is not that sure this would be the easiest path to follow through (and maybe discover that it wasn't really what the person wanted to do with his/her life)... and that couple people so openly criticize is so certain of their conexion, their feelings, their choice, that they fight pre-conceptions... they stand their ground to live their happiness... and sure, such strong, independent, rational people can't be considered unworthy or unfit to educate somebody, can they?

I could go on and on forever defending people's right to live as they believe to be the best way for them, single, married, living together, with friends, with partners, with pets, with children, without... why should labels matter that much? why should somebody be shocked when shown the photo of a happy family? because they are not happy through the way you were expecting them to be
? it doesn't make any sense... really? today I'll settle on being disappointed, and hoping for a change... we can still hope...

1 comment:

  1. Eu penso como vc. Vamos torcer para q os hj são pequenos. sejam mais conscientes da beleza que é ser diferente e tenham paz para construir sua felicidade da forma q tiverem vontade.